Empathic Listening: A Strategic Advantage for Senior Leaders
Steven R. Covey made some insightful contributions to executive leadership. One of his most powerful ideas in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People describes a listening skill that, once mastered, will heighten the impact of your leadership.
In fast-paced executive environments, leaders are often expected to respond quickly, offer guidance, and drive outcomes. Yet one of the most underutilized and powerful leadership tools is also the most basic: listening. More specifically, empathic listening—listening with the intent to truly understand another person’s perspective—can dramatically improve how we lead, communicate, and influence. Empathic listening is a vital leadership skill for executives who need to build trust, foster collaboration, and guide organizational change.
Let’s look at the ways we tend to listen, and practical steps to adjust our listening habits to master this skill.
The Problem with Autopilot Listening
In most professional interactions, leaders tend to listen with the intent to reply, solve, or redirect. We share our own experiences as examples. We jump to conclusions. We advise before we understand. While well-intentioned, these habits undermine trust, diminish insight, and cut off the potential for real problem-solving.
Covey refers to this as autobiographical listening: filtering everything through your own lens. It leads to four common (but unhelpful) types of responses:
Evaluating: Agreeing or disagreeing before full understanding
Probing: Asking questions based on assumptions rather than what’s being said
Advising: Offering solutions without context
Interpreting: Projecting your own motives onto someone else’s situation
These approaches may feel efficient amid all the demands made on our time as senior leaders, but it compromises effectiveness. There is a better way that provides you and your colleagus with a more effective and more efficient outcomes because it leads to better solutions, strengthens communication, and encourages initiative.
What Is Empathic Listening?
Empathic listening goes beyond active or attentive listening. It’s not just about hearing words—it’s about understanding meaning, emotion, and context. It draws on all channels of communication: not just what’s said (10% of the message), but tone (30%) and body language (60%).
Crucially, empathic listening does not require agreement. Rather, it demands openness—suspending judgment long enough to genuinely understand how another person sees the world. That understanding becomes the foundation for trust, collaboration, and influence.
A Leadership Skill, Not a Soft Skill
Empathic listening is not a "soft" interpersonal trait—it's a disciplined, learnable skill that supports strategic leadership. Practiced well, it acts as a form of high-quality data collection, allowing you to:
Understand the full scope of issues before making decisions
Diagnose before prescribing—leading to more effective interventions
Create psychological safety for your team to contribute honestly and productively
Build the trust capital that makes difficult conversations and change initiatives easier
The Executive Benefits of Empathic Listening
For senior leaders, the stakes are higher and the ripple effects of poor communication broader. Empathic listening delivers measurable benefits at the executive level:
Better Decision-Making
When you understand the real concerns behind a stakeholder’s words, you gain clarity. You make decisions based on full-spectrum insight rather than assumptions or filtered input.Stronger Alignment Across Teams
Empathic listening fosters mutual understanding. When people feel heard, they become more open to collaboration and alignment, even when perspectives differ.Greater Influence and Trust
People follow leaders they trust. Empathic listening builds that trust by signaling respect, attentiveness, and a genuine interest in others’ success.Improved Conflict Resolution
Many conflicts stem not from disagreement, but from misunderstanding. Empathic listening uncovers what’s really at stake and helps move beyond surface-level positions.Enhanced Organizational Culture
Leaders set the tone. When empathic listening becomes part of how leadership operates, it cultivates a culture of psychological safety, engagement, and continuous learning.
Ways to master empathic listening
Developing this habit takes intention and practice. Here are concrete steps executives can take:
1. Use the “3-to-1” Ratio
Action: For every statement you make, ask or invite three responses. For example: “Can you tell me more about that?”, “How did that feel to you?”, “What are you hoping for next?”
Why it matters: It rebalances conversations away from executive monologues toward mutual understanding.
2. Pause Before Responding
Action: Take a breath or count to three before jumping in with a solution or reaction.
Why it matters: This brief pause gives space to absorb what’s being said—and demonstrates patience and presence.
3. Reflect and Paraphrase
Action: Use phrases like “What I’m hearing is…” or “It sounds like you’re saying…” to paraphrase what’s been shared.
Why it matters: Reflection builds clarity and helps the other person feel truly heard.
4. Ask Open-Ended Questions
Action: Avoid yes/no questions. Instead, use prompts like:
“What’s been most challenging for you?”
“What are you hoping will change?”
“How do you see things unfolding?”
Why it matters: Open questions encourage deeper dialogue and uncover key insights.
5. Practice Nonverbal Presence
Action: Maintain eye contact, minimize distractions (no phones or multitasking), and use attentive body language.
Why it matters: Your nonverbal cues either reinforce or undermine your verbal message of care and attention.
6. Get Feedback on Your Listening
Action: Ask trusted colleagues or a coach: “Do I come across as someone who listens well? What could I do differently?”
Why it matters: Self-perception often differs from how others experience your leadership. Feedback builds self-awareness.
7. Practice in Low-Stakes Settings
Action: Use everyday conversations—at home, in casual settings, or with peers—as practice grounds.
Why it matters: Empathic listening is a muscle you build over time. Low-pressure contexts are ideal for honing the habit.
8. Reflect Daily
Action: End your day by asking:
“Who did I listen to today?”
“Where did I interrupt or assume?”
“What would I do differently next time?”
Why it matters: Consistent reflection helps solidify new habits.
9. Model It Publicly
Action: In meetings, summarize others’ points before giving your own, acknowledge diverse perspectives, and credit others’ contributions.
Why it matters: Leaders set the tone. Your example helps shape a culture where everyone listens and feels heard.
10. Schedule Listening Time
Action: Set aside time specifically for listening— during one-on-ones, team check-ins, or open-door conversations.
Why it matters: It signals to others that you prioritize their voice and allows you to slow down and focus.
What results can you expect?
Some of the benefits you’ll see from developing this habit include:
Builds psychological safety and trust across teams
Surfaces better ideas through deeper understanding of context
Reduces conflict and improves cross-functional alignment
Increases employee engagement and loyalty
Strengthens your executive presence as someone who listens to understand, not just to respond
Bottom Line: Empathic listening is not a nicety—it’s a strategic imperative. In a world where speed, complexity, and pressure are constant, the leaders who listen well are the ones who lead best.
For more details about how to develop this habit, check out The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People as a traditional book, e-book or audiobook. Enjoy!